Hindsight is a beautiful thing. The ability to look back, reflect and most importantly, learn. It’s been one whole year since India and I left for Sri Lanka. We packed up our lives in London, left the comfort of a great house with Katrina and busily took our next steps into the unknown. It was a hard decision to leave what was a comfortable lifestyle, in a great flat, in a buzzing part of London. Yet now looking back I am so glad that I decided to have a break from this great city. I can’t believe how fast it’s gone, this time last year we were somewhere along the West coast of Sri Lanka, probably in a thunderstorm eating Rice & Curry.
Last Summer my sense of validation was totally thrown. Things I had worked so hard for and a path I thought I was on were suddenly whipped away without me even having a moment to understand how or why. Yet I took amazing friends with me, lessons on life and an appreciation of understanding that paths are never certain and it’s ok to leave them. Discomfort can be unsettling but also it can be a sign telling you you need to make a change. My change was forced upon me but my goodness I am grateful for the new lease of life it allowed me. To be able to travel to new countries and live a beach bum lifestyle is an incredibly fortunate position to be in.
I have never felt in a stronger position to be able to evaluate and put things into perspective. I don’t quite know when my mindset shifted but I don’t worry so much about the small things anymore. As a former self-confessed worrier who was given a worry doll for her 22nd Birthday I used to fret over everything. A perfectionist mindset is both a blessing and a hindrance. Perhaps it is down to the travelling. Without trying to sound cliche when you see people happy and grateful to have food, health and family and little else you start to wonder why you even bothered worrying about certain things. Also after spending time on sweaty buses hurtling round blind corners and sleeping on questionable mattresses things that could be a worry start to fade away. After all where’s the use in fretting?
So it’s now at 27 I find myself becoming more interested in well, life! Last year I felt like I was always rushing around, never stopping to think why I was doing something. Putting all my energy into relationships which weren’t doing me any good. I was merely meandering through life, putting a coat of make up on and a willing smile. Take away the make-up and the daily routine and things get a little more interesting. Since being back in England I have begun to pursue my interests; yoga, poetry, writing and cycling. I’ve learnt it’s ok to stay in, it’s ok to say no to a pint and it’s fine to say yes to one. It’s ok to just be by yourself.